One of the biggest things New Yorkers have in common is that most of us are not from New York. We come from all around the world, bringing with us foods, customs, fabrics and traditions that build up the foundation of what makes this city special.
We also bring with us a collective sense of missing home. Whether we’re a plane ride, visa or vacation time away from our families, homesickness strikes at the most unlikely of times.
Take comfort in the fact that we are not alone in our loneliness, and that being an insider in a city of nearly 9 million means we can lean on each other in times of hardship. We’re just as strong as the families we choose, or at least until the next time we make it home.
Your 20s to be family
P.S. Don’t forget to call your mom — she’ll appreciate it.
“I haven’t been home for Chinese New Year since 2012 — years missed of exchanging four-worded blessings to extended family members, pigging out on dishes prepared in multiples of eight, and trekking to the temple at midnight to light incense at the temple. It has never worked out that I had the days off to fly home for a celebration so close to my heart. It doesn’t help that in a white American environment, the holiday I looked forward to every year seemed to hold as much bearing as National Cheese Day, while everyone else got designated days off for Easter, Rosh Hashanah, and Christmas.”
Jojo, 24, on coming home for the holidays for the first time in six years.
“I thought I was going back to California immediately after graduation, but I was always told that we go to college just to get a job, and it felt like a waste to have worked so hard toward building a career here to just leave the city right after senior year. Ultimately, my network and drive to make it in New York convinced me to stay. I ended up going into the tech industry, which allowed me to keep up with my friends and family still living in the Bay Area all while never having to give up living in New York — all it took was hard work and being vocal about the role I wanted.”
Carolynn, 24, on sticking to her roots without giving up her New York City life.
- Home is where the heart is, but for many New Yorkers, that’s not quite New York. Here are our favorite tricks on how to make the city a bit more homey.
- Is the cost of your commute taking a toll? This calculator shows how much money you can save if you take advantage of your employer’s pre-tax benefit.
- We’re Marie Kondo-ing the hell out of our apartments this January, but those of you who are questioning the method and its implications to our very real lives aren’t alone.
- There is a problem at work — we’ve found some helpful advice on how to break the situation to your manager.
How do you cope with homesickness? We’re sharing ways we’ve felt closer to home in our moments of weakness, whether we’re from abroad or a short train ride away.
For this round, you’ve asked: “How do you cancel plans if you really can’t afford to be going out yet again?”
Our favorite, and most relatable response, was from Samira, who said,
To be absolutely honest, I would cancel dinner plans so often to the point where I felt like I needed a doctor’s note. I never felt comfortable talking about money. Instead of outright canceling, I suggest pot luck dinners, which helps me bond with my friends without the price tag.
Got a burning question to ask? Need some advice? Ask, and we will answer!
Hit us up for questions, comments, or whatever strikes your fancy at firstname.lastname@example.org.